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I read with understanding/satisfaction Dr. Janovs summaries and analyses. I am one of the proofs, for his idea, that Primal Therapy / Evolution in Reverse is potentially leading to a delayed freedom for us, who by survival reasons, due to traumas before, during and after birth, was forced to repress unbearable pain for decades. My understanding/satisfaction was slow in coming (≻30 years) because it took many visits back in time to sequentially re-live my 48 hr birth trauma.
Putting words on my journey back into my world of emotions and repressions has been difficult. 300 blogs in recent years have only marginally managed to penetrate the complexity evolution had billions of years to organize randomly. However, this does not prevent me from seeing and understanding the patterns and repetitions that my eventful neurotic life has been full of. Changing environment/culture/ language, family, work and leisure activities, when I had just managed to establish something seemingly satisfactory, was only marginally motivated by talent. My caprice has very much been an effect of early imprints. My birth lasted about 48 hours, during which I was obstructed, stuck, squeezed, choked, anesthetized and turned and pulled out "ass first." But I came out and I have never lacked inconvenient alternative challenges to deal with to reverse the trend...
My birth complexity complicated even my suicidal thoughts until Tegretol (Carbamazepine) anesthetized them. I never could figure out a way to end my life. All the suicidal ideas I came up with felt wrong and it ended, every time, that I gave myself another chance. Even in my dreams I have, for the most part, found a new resort when the agony was the greatest. Fate had ironically, that my mother's exaggerated interpretation of a biblical advice to "give birth with pain," that my management career was dominated by assignments as change expert.
I have the satisfaction of valuable historical experiences of my pain and my life pattern, when I now, slowly, as a retiree am taking me into the world of music trying to adapt myself to my tenor saxophone and interpreting blues scales. If I could turn grand mal seizures into negligible anxiety attacks, I will hopefully one day get Autumn Leaves to sound right. My life pattern speaks for me .... although I am late.
Jan Johnsson
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-arN8RqqBIQ
Arthur Janov 22 okt.
it is all so life-affirming. great art
How my daughter was saved from grand mal seizure.
ReplyDeleteI am not really a fan of sharing my personal private story on the internet but i decided to do this because this joy is too voluminous for me to hide. My daughter which i took over 8 years after marriage to conceive had her first seizure at age 8 and ever since then it has been from one seizure to another in school, in church, at picnics. This got me worried because she has a bright future that i do not want epilepsy to become a hindrance, i tried several doctors in Texas and none could help with an effective cure. I went on the internet and saw testimonies about a treatment for epilepsy which a doctor offered and i was interested, i got in contact with him and i was able to get the medicine for my daughter which she used for 3 months as he instructed and it has been over 6 months now she is doing just fine without any allergies or aftermath effects. If you are suffering problem try to reach him too on (josephalberteo@gmail.com) i can count on him for a cure for you too.